Your kids may think you're wonderful, but if you're like most mothers, you think you can do more.

Well, guess what? You can. But being a better mom isn't about what you give your children, it's about how you connect with them and, more surprisingly, how you treat yourself. Try these suggestions from Woman's Day magazine to make your relationship with your kids stronger and closer than ever.

Be the boss. We often abdicate the position of authority because we want to be our kids' friends. But if you don't take charge, someone else will become a voice of influence in your child's life, like his friends. Establish rules and enforce them.

Showcase your many layers. Kids need to view you as a well-rounded, multi-dimensional person, not just as a mom. If you work outside the home, tell them something interesting about your job. If you volunteer, share how you help others. If you have a hobby, ask them to take part.

Forget about educational toys. Children can learn just as much from their own imagination as they can from the latest brain-stimulating toy. Sometimes it's better to let her spend playtime simply putting pebbles in a bucket.

Allow your child to fail. Falling off a bike, getting a poor grade — these are all learning opportunities. If you rush in to fix it, you're telling your child that trying is not good enough and that perfection is required. The better lesson? Keep trying despite letdowns.

Play soothing music. Make the morning rush less stressful with soothing music. You may still be rushing around but you'll feel more relaxed and ease morning tension.

Be a kid again. Take a cue from your children and play. Spend time outdoors with them doing whatever they want to do. Before you know it, you'll be focused on the moment with no thoughts of to-do lists. That's when you'll truly connect with your kids.

Don't be a hovering soccer mom. Kids whose parents go to every one of their games are less likely to continue with sports as young adults. They're often playing just to please Mom and Dad rather than for their own enjoyment. Except for the major games, drop off the kids and leave. This teaches kids to cheer for themselves.

Say no to your kids. It makes you a better parent. By turning down your children's endless requests, you teach them how to cope with disappointment and to understand that they can't have everything they want — which will help them in the future.

Create a village. Build a backup team you can count on. Your village may include family, longtime friends, kind neighbors and other parents in your community.

Source: The May 6 issue of Woman's Day. Online, go to www.womansday.com.