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The Honolulu Advertiser
Posted on: Monday, March 17, 2008

Introduce quality time with 'family slowdowns'

By Leanne Italie
Associated Press

Hawaii news photo - The Honolulu Advertiser

Susan Linn, right, author and instructor of psychiatry at Harvard University, jokes with her granddaughter, Marley Craine, 5, as they make paste to glue decorations to a birthday card for a relative.

JOSH REYNOLDS | Associated Press

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Does your teen turn on the sarcasm when she's kicked off the computer? Is your grade-schooler asking for more quality time with the TV?

It could be your kids are overprogrammed and overstimulated in these hectic, wired times, and your family could stand to be unplugged. Tossing the electronics, if only temporarily, provides your kids with your undivided attention.

Nix the phone, shut down the computer and turn off the television for a "family slowdown." It may be hard to find the time, but it's worth it, said Susan Linn, author of the new book "The Case for Make Believe, Saving Play in a Commercialized World."

"Remember that your child is going to be grappling with electronic media and the things it sells for the rest of their lives," said Linn, a psychiatry instructor at Harvard Medical School. "They'll be better equipped to cope if they have lots of experience enjoying their own ability to make things happen, using their own curiosity as an impetus for actively exploring the world."

Pamela Pensock, a single mother of twin 12-year-old boys in Brooklyn, N.Y., couldn't agree more. She provided a virtually TV-free, computer-free life for her boys when they were younger and says she can see the benefits now that they're in sixth grade.

"They still play with action figures, interact on a creative level when their friends come over," said Pensock, a freelance writer and editor. "I give my kids little talks about some of their peers, about 'Well, isn't it strange that all they can do is watch TV?' Peer pressure is big in middle school and we do have a TV now but the funny thing is they don't even watch it."

Of course, there are times when even the most attentive parents are grateful to the creators of DVDs and video recorders. But quieter activities that kids can do mostly themselves with exhausted grownups nearby can replace electronic baby sitters.

Dig into the desk for rubberbands and have them start a rubberband ball. Teach them old-fashioned hand string games, get them to think up a story and draw their own illustrations to go with it or suggest freestyle origami that encourages kids to be inventive.

Whatever suits your family, Linn urges parents to start young.

• • •

Taking it slow

Ideas for special family slowdowns:

PUPPETS: They can be made on the fly out of a variety of textured, colorful materials. Children as young as 2 can make puppets out of old socks and wads of cotton balls or recycled pantyhose secured by hair bands. Use markers to decorate and sew on button eyes if you have the time. Use a cardboard box as a stage and assign every member of the family a puppet for a performance of your child's creation.

BUILDING BRICKS: Plastic clip-together bricks like Lego can be purchased by the bucket or in specialty sets. Parents need only sit and build at their kids' instruction. The brick comes in easy-to-grip larger sizes for toddlers and tiny, intricate pieces for older kids.

DRAMATIC READ-ALOUDS: Let your child pick a favorite book and choose a family member to be narrator, preferably the one who does funny and-or scary voices the best. Let other family members dress up as characters in the book and act out their parts as the story unfolds.

SEW A FAMILY QUILT: Quilting doesn't have to be hard. You can buy batting in bulk at low cost. Send your kids on a treasure hunt for old blankets, nightgowns, linens and other fabric scraps around the house. Sew squares together by hand as a group or take turns on a machine. Your goal is not necessarily to produce heirloom quality.

PUT OUT A FAMILY NEWSPAPER: Assign somebody breaking "news" of the day, the sports beat, movie reviews and advertising. Give each family member two pages and caution them to leave room for ads that can be cut out and glued throughout the newspaper. You can base your paper on real events or make it up! Spread the work over time or operate on a "deadline" of an hour or two. Staple or stitch together.

HAIR SALON: Grab every hair band and bauble in the house and haul them over to the dining room table so your daughter can plop you in a chair and make over your look.