The √ indicates admission is $5 or less, or free. Full-price admission is listed; the * denotes discounts (or free) for students, seniors, military, members, children and/or advance purchase.

STAGE

"THE GLITCH THAT STOLE CHRISTMAS," Murder Mystery Dinner Theatre; 7 p.m. Saturday; Dave and Buster's; repeats 7 p.m. Oct. 25, Nov. 15 and 29; $36.95; 589-2215, www.myspace.com/murdermysteryplayers.

"LES MISERABLES," based on the novel by Victor Hugo; repeats 8 p.m. Thursdays-Saturdays, 4 p.m. Sundays (matinees: 3 p.m. Oct. 11 and 18), extended through Oct. 19; Diamond Head Theatre; $12*-$42*; 733-0274, www.diamondheadtheatre.com.

"MISS SAIGON," the musical by Claude-Michel Schonberg and Alain Boublil; repeats 7:30 p.m. Fridays- Saturdays, 2 p.m. Sundays through Oct. 26, extended 2 and 7:30 p.m. Nov. 1 and 2 p.m. Nov. 2; Paliku Theatre, Windward Community College; $30*; 235-7310, www.etickethawaii.com.

"THE HISTORY BOYS," award- winning play by Alan Bennett, presented by The Actors' Group; repeats 7:30 p.m. Thursdays-Saturdays, 2 and 5 p.m. Sundays through Oct. 26; Mendonca Building, second floor; $16*; 722-6941, www.taghawaii.net.

"PAY ATTENTION — ADHD IN HOLLYWOOD ON THE ROCKS WITH A TWIST," one-man show, written and performed by Frank South; repeats 8 p.m. Fridays-Saturdays through Oct. 25; Academy of Film & Television, 1174 Waimanu St., Unit A; $15; 550-8457, www.honoluluboxoffice.com.

COMEDY

"Weenie Man-O-Logs," spoof of "Vagina Monologues" and "Menopause The Musical," featuring Kato Kaelin, Murray Langston, Thai Rivera and Danielle Kasen; premieres 8:30 p.m. today, continuing Thursdays-Sundays; Cirque Hawaii; $30 general, $40 VIP; 922-0017.

HAWAII COMEDY THEATER, Comedy Polynesia, 7:30 p.m., $25*; Sharkey's Comedy Club, 9 p.m., $15*; Fridays-Saturdays; Sheraton Princess Ka'iulani hotel, Kapuni Room; 531-4242.

COMEDY ON THE MOON, with Shawn Felipe, Lanai, Champ Kaneshiro; 8 p.m. Thursdays; Brew Moon; 18 and older; $10; 593-0088.

IMPROV COMEDY, presented by Laughtrack Theater Company; 8 and 10 p.m. Fridays and Saturdays; Laughtrack Theater, 1123 Bethel St.; $10*; 384-3362.

AT THE MALLS

√ ALA MOANA CENTER: Honolulu Community Concert Band Fall Concert, 12-12:45 p.m. Sunday. Ongoing: keiki hula show, 10-11 a.m. Sundays; free; 955-9517.

√ WARD WAREHOUSE: line dance classes, 6-8:30 p.m. Tuesdays; lauhala weaving demonstration, 9 a.m.-2 p.m. Saturdays; free; www.wardcentre.com.

√ PEARLRIDGE CENTER, UPTOWN: Aloha Friday Mele with Baba Alimoot & Friends, 11:30 a.m.-1:30 p.m. Friday; fifth annual HECO Live Energy Lite Fair, 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Saturday; Ho'okahi Sunday Afternoons, with Kaipo Asing Trio, 1-2 p.m. and Halau Hula O Mokulehua, 2:30 p.m. Sunday; Mokichi Okada Association Hawaii Healthy Monday Wellness Activities, 8:30-10:30 a.m. Monday. Ongoing: Keiki Tuesday-Special Fire Prevention Celebration, 10:30 a.m.-12 p.m. Tuesdays; Junior Keiki Tuesday and chess lessons, 6-8 p.m. Tuesdays free; 488-0981.

√ WINDWARD MALL: Blood Bank of Hawai'i blood drive, 7 a.m.-1 p.m. Saturday; free; 235-1143.

MUSIC & DANCE

√ ROYAL HAWAIIAN BAND: 12-1 p.m. today, 'Iolani Palace; 9:30-10:30 a.m., Saturday, Harvest Festival, Lilu'okalani Protestant Church, Haleiwa; 2-3 p.m. Sunday, Kapi'olani Park Bandstand; 12-12:45 p.m. Wednesday, Kapolei Hale Courtyard; free; 922-5331.

√ HAWAII BALLROOM DANCE ASSOCIATION: Saturday Ball Dance, 6:30-9:45 p.m. Nov. 1, Ala Wai Golf Course clubhouse, $5; Friday Ohana Night General Dance, 6:30-9:45 p.m. Oct. 17, Ala Wai Golf Course clubhouse, $3; Saturday Social Dance, 7-10 p.m. Oct. 11, Aliamanu Middle School cafeteria, donations accepted; 222-7851, 848-7789.

√ KUHIO BEACH TORCH-LIGHTING AND HULA SHOW, 6:30-7:30 p.m. daily except Mondays, Kuhio Beach hula mound; free; 843-8002.

√ DEREK DANIELS' ISLANDS OF ALOHA, hula show; 7-7:45 p.m.; Mondays, Wednesdays, Fridays and Saturdays; Waikiki Town Center; free; 922-2724.

√ SWING DANCE CLUB OF HAWAII, swing, two-step, hustle, fox trot, country and more; 8:30-10:30 p.m. Wednesdays; Dream to Dance Studio; $5; 255-6095.

FAMILY TIES

√ KEIKI STORYTIME, 10:30 a.m. Wednesdays; Borders, Ward Centre; free; 591-8995.

√ TODDLER STORY TIME, with crafts; 10 a.m. Mondays and Thursdays, through Dec. 20; Kapolei Public Library; free; 693-7050.

√ FALL STORYTIME, a craft or playtime will follow; 10:30 a.m.-11:15 a.m. Wednesdays, through Nov. 26; 'Ewa Beach Public & School Library; ages 3-5, with parent; free; 689-1204.

√ PRESCHOOL STORYTIME; 10:30-11 a.m. Wednesdays, through Oct. 22; Wahiawa Public Library; ages 3-4 with parent; free; 622-6345.

√ TODDLER TIME STORYTIME; 10 a.m. Mondays through Nov. 24; Hawai'i State Library; 3 and younger, with parent; free; 586-3510.

√ PRESCHOOL STORYTIME; 10:30-11 a.m. Wednesdays through Dec. 10; Kailua Public Library; ages 2-5 with parent; free; 266-9911.

ETC.

"MEGALODON: LARGEST SHARK THAT EVER LIVED," interactive exhibit presents the evolution, biology and misconceptions regarding giant prehistoric sharks; opens Saturday, continues through Jan. 11; Bishop Museum; $15.95* general, $8.95* kama'aina; 847-3511.

"BODIES ... THE EXHIBITION," touring exhibit features preserved whole and partial human body specimens; 9:30 a.m.-9 p.m. Mondays-Saturdays, 10 a.m.-7 p.m. Sundays, through December; Ala Moana Center, ground level next to Nordstrom; $26*; 877-273-4375, www.bodiesticket.com.

"WAIKIKI LU'AU ON THE LAGOON," with live music, interactive games and activities, dancing, traditional lu'au menu favorites, in conjunction with Tihati Productions; 5:15 p.m. Sundays and Wednesdays; Hilton Hawaiian Village, The Great Lawn; $95* (kama'aina and military rates: $80.75*); 949-4321, ext. 29.

√ "KEY INGREDIENTS: AMERICA BY FOOD," touring exhibit explores the connections between Americans and foods, with various guest speakers; 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Mondays, Thursdays-Saturdays, 10 a.m.-8 p.m. Tuesdays-Wednesdays, closed Sundays, through Oct. 18; Kapolei Public Library; free; 693-7050.

√ THINGS JAPANESE SALE; 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Tuesdays-Saturdays through Oct. 25; Japanese Cultural Center of Hawai'i Community Gallery & Gift Shop; free; 945-7633.

TOURS & ATTRACTIONS

ALOHA FRIDAY KING'S JUBILEE, 6:45 p.m. with flag ceremony, precision rifle drill and musical revue ($25, poolside seating), followed by fireworks display (free), 8 p.m. Fridays, Hilton Hawaiian Village; free; 949-4321, ext. 77881.

HAWAIIAN QUILTING BEE, 10 a.m.-2 p.m. every second and fourth Saturday of the month, Mission Houses Museum; $20*; reservations, 531-0481, ext. 714.

SENATOR FONG'S PLANTATION AND GARDENS TOUR, 10 a.m.- 2 p.m. daily, tours at 10:30 a.m. and 1 p.m. daily; Senator Fong's Plantation and Gardens, 47-285 Pulama Road; $14.50*; 239-6775.

"HONOLULU CITY HAUNTS," walking tour; 7:30-10:30 p.m. Thursdays and Saturdays; starts at 'Iolani Palace; ages 7 and older; $27*; 524-4944, www.oahughosttours.com.

ORBS OF O'AHU DRIVING TOUR, night driving tour to famous haunted sites; 7:30 p.m.-12 a.m. Mondays-Wednesdays, Fridays; call for location; 10 and older; $47*; 524-4944, www.oahughosttours.com.

SACRED SPIRITS DAYTIME CULTURAL TOUR, visit heiau and hiking trails; 8:30 a.m.-2:30 p.m. Wednesdays and Saturdays; call for location; ages 7 and older; $49*; 524-4944, www.oahughosttours.com.

√ NORTH SHORE SURF AND CULTURAL MUSEUM, vintage surfboard collection, photos, videos and more; 11:30 a.m.-6 p.m. Wednesdays-Mondays; North Shore Marketplace; free; 637-8888.