It happens every election season without fail. The economy can be in free fall, the country at war, raw sewage dumping into pothole-ridden streets, but it eventually comes to, "Somebody is stealing my signs!" As if that is the measure by which a political race should be judged. Petty thievery, or accused petty thievery. The smaller the race, the bigger the outrage.

For each pseudo-accusation, there is the counter pseudo-accusation: "We didn't touch your signs. In fact, somebody has been stealing OUR signs. Not to point fingers or anything."

(Point, point.)

The whole thing is so passive aggressive. And so passive. If people were standing behind those signs waving or giving a speech or just saying "howzit" rather than planting them in some guy's yard or tying them onto a chain link fence, they'd be a lot harder to steal.

Sure, it's irritating when somebody messes with your stuff, but it's so high school. When you get to be a grown-up, you're supposed to let things like that slide, because reacting to stupid stuff makes you a little bit stupid in the moment. It ends up getting so blown out of proportion. The police get called, as if they don't have enough to do without opening investigations into alleged sign stealing. In at least one instance, a candidate actually hired a detective to stake out his signs overnight.

There's a sad truth that anyone running for office or working on a campaign should accept: Signs will be stolen. They just will. Whether it comes by the opponent's nefarious command or just a band of unaffiliated miscreants with time on their hands between spray-painting freeway overpasses and stealing copper wire, it is bound to happen. It is part of the deal when you take that step into public life, along with other unpleasant things, such as snarky comments on message boards, snooping into past DUIs or unpaid tickets, and checking to make sure you really did get that diploma you listed on your resume. You can't play football without getting tackled sometimes, and you can't put up campaign signs without losing a few. Or more than a few. Plan for it in the campaign budget and let it go. Homeless villages are sprouting up all over the island, gas is $4 a gallon, people in Kapolei are sitting in traffic for 20 minutes just trying to make a left turn into Kmart. There are bigger issues that need attention.

Do campaign signs make or break an election bid, anyway? There's a faded but intact Dalton Tanonaka banner from 2004 still tied to a fence in Pearl City. Nobody's touched that one.

Lee Cataluna's column runs Tuesdays, Fridays and Sundays. Reach her at 535-8172 or lcataluna@honoluluadvertiser.com.