Married in a month
By Zenaida Serrano Espanol
Advertiser Staff Writer
A periodic series of stories to guide couples through the wedding-planning season March 5 April 16 May 6 May 20 May 27 June 3 |
Yet a mere month later, on April 13, Dick and Pumarejo celebrated their nuptials at a ceremony in Waimanalo.
Like the Pumarejos, many couples choose to marry in a hurry, sometimes within a month or even sooner. The reasons range from pregnancy to family illness, from a need to sign up for a spouse's benefit plan to pure spontaneity.
Dierdre Pumarejo said one of the reasons she and her husband decided to rush was that she did not have any medical benefits. Her fiancé, a command sergeant major in the Army, did.
"It just got to the point where we didn't want to wait anymore," she said.
While some people may think it's impossible to plan a nice wedding and reception in a month or less, many wedding planners say that it is indeed possible.
But they have also emphasized that couples should not count on it being their fantasy wedding come true.
"It's not very realistic," said Mona Hirata, a wedding planner with MG Concepts, a company that focuses on special events planning and promotions. "It would be difficult to get ... all the details that you want" in such a tight timeline.
"The whole reason for planning early is to be able to book the vendors that you want, and a lot of times, those get booked a year or a year and a half in advance."
James Ledgerwood, a wedding coordinator at First United Methodist Church, said the simplest thing for an eager-to-marry couple to do would be to leave the planning to a professional, such as someone from a wedding planning company, or a church or hotel wedding coordinator.
"That is the easiest, least-impact-to-your-life option," he said.
That's what the Pumarejos did. After doing research on the Internet, they decided to work with a planner from Above Heaven's Gate in Waimanalo for their ceremony.
"He took care of everything," said Dierdre Pumarejo, an administrative assistant.
Their planner, who simply goes by Captain Howie, said he was able to put together a package for the Pumarejos that included hair and makeup services, photography, videography and flowers for a little more than $1,000.
Another option for couples who are in a hurry to make their union legal would be to marry first, then plan for a nicer reception at a later date, said Susan Tongg O'Donnell, owner of Aloha Wedding Planners.
All you truly need to get married are a marriage license, a licensed officiant and the person you want to marry.
"That's it," she said. "Everything else is fluff."
The Pumarejos, for instance, did not have a wedding reception after their April ceremony. They are planning one for about 50 family members and close friends next year in Pennsylvania, where they're both from.
Still, some couples may feel that even a short-notice wedding would not be complete without a post-ceremony reception.
If leaving the entire affair up to a professional isn't an option, it is possible to plan the quick wedding yourself.
We asked some local wedding planners for advice and tips to help couples who want to plan the big day in just a month:
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| Illustration by Martha Hernandez The Honolulu Advertiser |
- • Determine the guest count.
Deciding on the number of guests is an important first step because it will probably determine where the event will take place, Tongg O'Donnell said. "If you are planning something very last-minute for less than 20 people, that's really easy, because you can go almost anywhere," she said. But if a couple wants to invite 50 to 100 or more guests, "now you're looking at having to secure a location that can accommodate those numbers of people."
- • Book the ceremony and reception sites.
Of all the wedding services that require advance booking, Hirata said, the reception sites book the fastest, so couples need to take care of this early on.
- • Set a budget and prioritize.
Couples should set a realistic budget, said Gail Kaneshiro, wedding director of A Perfect Hawaii Wedding. Then they need to consider what's most important to them, whether it's their attire, flowers, food or entertainment. "That way they can see how much they can allow (for each priority) as far as spending money goes," Kaneshiro said. "Once they're satisfied with their initial plan, then it can go really fast."
Week 2: Line up vendors; delegate tasks.
- • Hire vendors.
By this point, couples should start to make and finalize arrangements for the basics, including an officiant or minister for the ceremony, caterer, florist, photographer and entertainers, Kaneshiro said. The bride- and groom-to-be should also take care of buying or renting their wedding attire and the attire for their bridal party.
- Be willing to compromise.
"Just know that because it's such short notice, you may not get what you want" in vendors, products and services, said Rhonda Tsugawa, a wedding coordinator at Calvary by the Sea Lutheran Church. So couples need to be flexible, she said.
- Get as much help as possible.
Turn to relatives and friends for help. While coordinating and delegating tasks among everyone involved may be a bit of a burden, Hirata said, the extra help is well worth it. "You'll always need people to help," Hirata said, whether it's to make favors and centerpieces, set up at the ceremony, or seat guests at the reception.
Week 3: Tie up loose ends
- Get a marriage license.
This is a good time to get the marriage license. An application must be prepared and filed in person with a marriage license agent at the state Department of Health, Kaneshiro said. The fee is $50, which must be paid in cash at the time the application is filed.
- Confirm your bookings.
Double check your reservations and details for the ceremony and reception sites, as well as all vendors.
Week 4: Celebrate
- Pamper yourself.
"If it's within the budget, get a massage," Hirata said. Or find some other way to momentarily escape the wedding-planning hysteria. Hirata also suggests that the prospective bride make a fun day of it with her bridesmaids.
- Maintain your perspective.
Couples preparing for the momentous event in a rush can get caught up in the stress of preparations and easily lose focus on what matters most, Hirata said. She reminds couples: "The whole purpose of having a wedding is to celebrate a relationship and to celebrate a commitment."
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Reading list
Some books for couples wanting to get hitched in a hurry:
- "How to Plan an Elegant Wedding in 6 Months or Less: Achieving Your Dream Wedding When Time is of the Essence" by Sharon Naylor (Prima Publishing, $16.95 paperback)
- "How to 'I Do': Planning the Ultimate Wedding in Six Weekends or Less" by Holly Lefevre and Christine Cudanes (Regan Books, $20 spiral-bound)
- "Bride's Shortcuts and Strategies for a Beautiful Wedding" by the editors of Bride's Magazine with Kathy C. Mullins (Perigee, $8.95 paperback)
- "14-Day Wedding Planner with Internet Guide" by Don and Sanda Altman (Moon Lake Media, $9.95 paperback)
- "Last Minute Weddings" by Donna A. Bankhead and Lynnette Blas(Career Press, $10.99 paperback)
Source: amazon.com
